Stalling for Time

Tuesday, October 31

Harassment

Dear Ian and Andrew, My name is Pam Gerber and I am the Victim Advocate with the University Police. I am writing in regard to the incident that you recently reported to this department, and to let you know that I am available to speak with you if you have any questions or concerns about this situation. You may refer to the link below for more information about victim services. Please feel free to contact me if I can be of any assistance to you!

So, last night, I'm crossing the street (15mph speed limit) and some asshole in a Civic (of course) flies down the road at about 40. Damn near hits me and Ian, comes to a screeching halt. He gets out, and I'm startled because he looks exactly like I'd expect him to: He's a stereotypical asian. Spiked hair, sucks at driving, kinda ghetto, drives a Honda. He shoves Ian, shouting about how retarded we are. Ian starts yelling at him and he gets back into his car and speeds off. We took the high road and reported the fucker.

I'm going to see Dashboard and Brand New. Again.

Monday, October 30

Musics!

Brand New opened for Dashboard. Brand New opened for Dashboard. Brand New opened for Dashboard. This is wrong. That, and the only old songs BN played were Sic Transit and But My Tommygun Don't. Oh, and I had to sit through the whole thing, because the floor was closed off. Honestly, that show had so much potential, and they fucked it up. Also, Dashboard ended every song like it was the last song they were playing, and when they played Vindicated I swear to God my ears started bleeding from a million little kids screaming. But the show still kicked ass.

New Arrivals:

  • Barenaked Ladies - Are Me
  • Ben Folds - Supersunnyspeedgraphic
  • Kasabian - Empire
  • Keller Williams - Grass
  • Reel Big Fish - Our Live Album is Better Than Your Live Album
  • Plus 44 - When Your Heart Stops Beating
  • Senses Fail - Still Searching

Wednesday, October 25

(Stop doing this.)

Jon Signed Off: I just witnessed the most retarded thing ever
WTF This is Lame: do tell
Jon Signed Off: Some stupid fucking cunt at the dining hall was trying to place an order while she's on her cellphone
Jon Signed Off: And changes her order a million times and asks the guy to toast her fucking bun
WTF This is Lame: hahahahahaha
Jon Signed Off: Finally he says, "Listen, I'm not serving you until you tell me exactly what you want, and you get off the cellphone, because it's hard to understand what you're saying, and it's rude."
Jon Signed Off: Which then causes an enormous shitstorm
Jon Signed Off: ("NUH UH! All you have to do is take my order! Is it THAT HARD to UNDERSTAND? OH MY GOD!")
Jon Signed Off: So then he just laughs and starts taking orders from people behind her
WTF This is Lame: is that dude your hero
Jon Signed Off: She realizes he's going to ignore her, turns to the kid in front of me, and goes
Jon Signed Off: "DID YOU ORDER A BBQ CHICKEN SANDWICH" "...Yes." "I'M TAKING IT." "(stunned silence)" "BECAUSE I ORDERED LIKE, TEN MINUTES AGO, LIKE, AND I SHOULD HAVE MINE NOW, SO I'M TAKING YOURS."
WTF This is Lame: what
Jon Signed Off: Guy at the grill looks at the guy in line and they both start laughing
Jon Signed Off: He finishes making the sandwich, boy gets it and walks away laughing
WTF This is Lame: is the girl hot or something?
Jon Signed Off: She was kinda cute, she was also about four feet tall and wearing a sky blue bubble jacket
Jon Signed Off: and talking on a pink razr
WTF This is Lame: oh fuck that
Jon Signed Off: Which is to say, it's stupid cunt awareness day at camp retard
WTF This is Lame: hahaha
Jon Signed Off: So then the manager comes in and says "You need to get off the phone. That's rude." and gives her her stupid sandwich and she prances off.
Jon Signed Off: I'm not done.
WTF This is Lame: wat
Jon Signed Off: Dining hall has two registers, one of which is usually closed
Jon Signed Off: Manager is opening the closed register, bitch walks up to her and starts arguing, finally relents and walks over to the open register
Jon Signed Off: and fucking cuts me
Jon Signed Off: like she deserves to be in the front of the line because she was too busy bitching to actually stand there
WTF This is Lame: hahahaha same bitch?
Jon Signed Off: So I just rolled my eyes and handed the register woman my card and register woman ignores her entirely.
Jon Signed Off: (Yes)
WTF This is Lame: nie
WTF This is Lame: nice
Jon Signed Off: Then she's like "I'M JUST LEAVING MY STUFF HERE SO I CAN GO GET SOMETHING ELSE"
Jon Signed Off: (This is as I'm walking away)
Jon Signed Off: Which basically means she's going to come back, and cut everyone, again.
Jon Signed Off: Because she left her shit at the front of the line.
WTF This is Lame: hahahaha
Jon Signed Off: Moral of the story is,
WTF This is Lame: I hate dining halls
Jon Signed Off: don't start smoking because I need a fucking cigarette.

Honestly now. God forbid you have to fucking say, "CAN I CALL YOU BACK" because I'm pretty sure whatever stupid, vacuous conversation that cunt was having with her equally vacuous friend has absolutely no significance - at all - to absolutely anyone besides them. In fact, it probably has no significance to them either, because I can guarantee you that half of it was about one of the following:

  • Grey's Anatomy
  • Boys
  • Her period
The other half of the conversation was her, narrating the whole incident to her friend as it happened. I know this because I watched her fucking do it.

Get off your Goddamn cellphone. Christ, I hate this shit at every job I've had - People treat you like you're not a person. They just shout orders at you, no personality whatsoever, and expect you to do them. No human contact. It was worst at West. It's so fucking degrading to say, "Hey, this is Jon, can I help you?" and get nothing but "CORTISLIM." as a reply. And to be second to someone's fucking retarded cellphone conversation, that's gotta be ten times worse.

The funny thing is, that bitch is gonna be behind that same counter, or another stainless-steel fast-food counter just like it, in about two years.

Monday, October 23

(nothing)

I realized this weekend that I live my entire life in the time between periods of stress. All last week and the week before, I had a lot on my mind and knew that once the weekend came, I'd be absolved of all my responsibility. So I waited for that and did absolutely nothing with the time in between. I'd sit in my room, do my work (incredibly slowly) and dick around. I'd do nothing productive with my life except what I had to get done.

This is no way to go through life. I wish I could motivate myself to finish what I have to do, instead of ignore it but let the stress hold me back.

Thursday, October 19

The Couch Debacle & SecondLife

I saw A Scanner Darkly. It kicked ass. See it. Oh, and I'm coming home this weekend. Huzzah. I officially still hate calc.

Housing sent me a letter that implies that I behave negatively, unsafely, and unproductively because I relocated a couch. Oops! Click the thumbnail to read it.

I wrote this bit for my Lit class. It's about a NY Times article that I can't track down online. The article was about corporate advertising in SecondLife, an online life simulation.

I recall, vaguely, an old program called AmeriWorld. It wasn’t much more than a glorified chat program, and at the time, it was an amusing thing to play with. AmeriWorld was a virtual landscape where you commanded a character that would walk around, but you couldn’t do much more besides talk to people and visit virtual restaurants, and so on. A few years later, The Sims was released, and it was a huge hit. Players created an e-life, buying a house and even getting jobs, getting married, and possibly dying.

You put these two concepts together and you get SecondLife, a very involved online world. When I first read the article, titled “A Virtual World but Real Money,” I was so disguisted, I locked myself in my room for three days and rocked back and forth, hugging my knees and weeping for humanity. Actually, no. But I really, really wanted to, and I may have thrown up in my mouth a little.

SecondLife has a population of a million. It is a virtual world with a fully developed landscape which expands daily to accommodate new residents. Not only can you chat with “real” people over the internet, but you can take them out to dates, go to restaurants, eat, go to strip clubs, get a job. All of these things involve e-money, but e-money and American cash can be exchanged at the rate of 400 “Linden” for a dollar.

The Times article was about advertising in this world. Companies like Nissan and Sony buy land, or even private islands, and set up shops where users can test-drive cars or listen to new music. Apparently there’s a huge market for selling luxury items to people that never leave their homes.

What frightens me is the concept of SecondLife itself. Here you have a world where people can form an entire life, including a social life and a job. $500,000 in cash circulates in SecondLife daily. The article mentioned one woman who is a Russian translator by day, but a sexy real estate mogul at night. She sits at her computer and rents land to people. eLand. She gets paid actual money for this, most of which is probably spent on her internet connection and consumer goods. Well, ingame consumer goods.

I usually think of myself as a fairly lenient person as far as “if it feels good, do it” goes. I consider myself to be an existentialist; I think that if you like doing something, and you can do it well, then you’ve found your place in life. Honestly, though. Internet? I’ll admit I’m a bit of a geek, and yeah, there was a time in my life when I was closer to my e-friends than my “real” friends. I was also thirteen. I had no responsibility to anything. My biggest concern in life was getting some girl to notice me (failed) and remembering to show all my work on my math homework.

Life is hard. E-Life is not. Fine. Whatever. There’s not as much social anxiety when you’re on the internet, you don’t physically have to do anything, and you never have to wait for the bus when you want to buy a CD. I understand that. But is life seriously so difficult that people would rather spend every waking hour online, making their numbers bigger, and paying for the privelige to do so?

I’m not just making an argument of principle here. Yes, it’s disguisting that people prefer computers to, I don’t know, life, but considering some of the crap that goes on down here, I don’t blame them. But there’s more to it than just that. Some of these people have jobs. Important jobs. Children. If you have a six-year-old depending on you to make money to provide shelter, food, clothing, as well as depending on you to raise her? That’s not just irresponsible, it’s downright wrong.

Wednesday, October 18

D'ya hate America?

I thought my eyes were going to roll out of my head.

I should clarify. The weekend I got here, my suitemates and I stole a couch from a study lounge on the third floor, on the other side of the building. It took four of us, in shifts, to carry it up to our room since we'd quenched our thirst immediately beforehand. One of our hallmates watched this happen, and over the next few weeks, he and the residents of several other rooms followed suit. Eventually, our RA caught on to what we were doing and told us to put it back. We didn't.

At that point, we'd become so used to it, we forgot it was stolen. Guests slept on it, we all studied on it (putting it to a legit use), and a good time was had by all. Since the couch was being used by other residents of the hall, as well as students from elsewhere on campus, we figured we were morally right to do what we did.

A few weeks later, RA Jeff said "I'm going to be here tonight to see if the couch is gone." Okay, whatever. We hid it in the shower all night. Jeff never showed. The next day, I walked to the door on my way to class and heard keys. Fearing the worst, I opened the door, and standing before me was the ResHall staff wielding a fucking dolly. Our couch was promptly stolen from us and returned to the wrong lounge. Given that, I think housing should be written up as well.

Today I had to go to a meeting with the housing coordinator (führer), who was a colossal bitch about the whole thing. The meeting was led by the question "So, tell me a few things about how the couch got into your room and why you left it there."

"Uhm. We walked down and picked it up. Then we moved it to our room. And then it was in our room. And it stayed there because we didn't feel like moving it."

"Oh." Seriously, when you ask a stupid (read: loaded and rhetorical) question, you get a stupid fucking answer. The rest of the meeting involved the bit of paperwork linked above, and closed on, "Do you understand why what you did was wrong?" Seriously, she treated me like I just stabbed her fucking grandmother.

I never laughed so hard in my life.

Monday, October 16

Renovation

Revisions are being made. Archives alive and well at http://vulgarity.org/forums. Patience, thanks.

Currently I'm pleased with the way the site looks. When I get around to it, I'll customize this instead of using one of the default templates, but man, this looks better than anything I could come up with. Oh well.